This is my 400th post.
But I'm sad.

I feel drained out, by academics, by peer pressure, by family.

I don't know where to start from to rant and vent out all my anger, my sadness.
I don't know where to start from to start studying for As.
I don't know where to start from to console my family,

I feel sad.
I feel pressurised.
I feel stress.

But what can I do?

I've to put on a real two-sided face both in school and at home.
Can someone really tell me what to do?

I hate school now, I've phobia of my class, phobia of everything.
One by one, everyone is leaving. And now, I'm left with myself all alone, to come face to face with my class.
It's not that I hate my class, it's the actions and behaviours and their smartness in them that makes me stupid, makes me think that I'm useless, hopless and makes me want to run away from them, from everything.
Even what my CLL teacher says also makes me think that way. And now, I've got no more motivation from my friends. No one will understand what I'm thinking of now.

And worse at home, sigh. I don't even want to talk about it.
I've got the worse case ever.

FML.
I really really feel like killing myself now.